As I was surfing the web tonight I happened across this Handy-Dandy List that some other WONDERFUL mother posted on her blog. What's amazing is that, just today, as I was
emptyingthekitchentrashwhilepickingupbitsofdriedplaydougharoundaudrey'sarttableandthenwipingupthecrumbsshehaddroppedatlunchallthewhilefeedingethancheeriosinhishighchairandIalmostforgottogetclaire'sdanceclothesfromthedryerandohlookthere'sjulian'ssocksballedupinthepantry...
You get the idea, right? Sometimes we (the parents) feel like we're doing ALL the work while the kids are upstairs watching a video with their parent-prepared snack. Christopher and I often stop in our tracks and look at each other and say, "Hey....isn't this something one of the kids can do??" It could be as simple as getting the mail, unballing socks by the back door, or closing the blinds at night. It's just one less thing that we have to do, and I bet if we added up all those 1 minute tasks, by golly, we'd earn ourselves a 15 minute sit-down! That would be like a mini-vacation for me and Christopher.
There's a dilemma I have heard from other moms: Am I asking my kids to do too much around the house? Am I asking them to do too little? What is the balance between "being a kid and enjoying childhood" and then "being an integral part of the family"? I read a book called, Children Who Do Too Little (http://www.amazon.com/Children-Who-Do-Too-Little/dp/0310211468) by Patricia Sprinkle, that got to the heart of this issue. She answered the question of why to teach kids to do work: 1. They need to learn to care for themselves, 2. They need to learn to serve on a family team, 3. They need to develop a work ethic, and 4. They need to learn to care for the world outside of themselves.
She also discusses why we, as parents, don't make our children work. We get labels like "The Servant" (one who does ALL the housework to justify being a stay-at-home-mom), "The Perfect Parent" (one who knows exactly how everything ought to be done and no one can do it as well), etc. In the end, she says it is important to spend time deciding what habits, standards, and values we learned in OUR background that we want to keep, what we want to discard, and what we want to change. We have to do this before training our children so they'll be set on the right path.
But back the The List. According to it, I'm pretty much on target (phew!) with Julian, Claire, and Audrey. My next question would be, at what point does it become a negative thing to do these listed chores? Audrey, almost 3, relishes the chance to sing Barney's Clean-up Song while loading her toys back in the toybox, yet this same song doesn't have the magic on 10 yr old Julian. Can you imagine the look I'd get from him if I burst out singing, "Clean up, clean up, everybody do your share! Clean up, clean up, everybody everywhere!" Hmmm... this sounds like an experiment and a future blog posting.
Ages 2-4: Pick up unused toys and put in the proper place
Sweep the floor
Clean up what they drop after eating
Clear own place at table
Simple hygiene--brush teeth, wash hands, brush hair.
Ages 4-5: Put groceries away
Help make the beds and vacuum
Help do dishes or fill in the dishwasher
Dust
Polish things
Sharpen pencils
Ages 5-6: Make their own sandwich
Pour their own drink
Make bed and clean room
Dress on own
Fold clean clothes
Help clean out the car
Take out the garbage
Learn to tie shoes
1st Grade: Shake rugs
Water plants
Peel vegetables
Rake leaves
2nd Grade: Take phone messages
Scrub floors
3rd Grade: Mop floor
Clean blinds
Run own bath
Straighten own closet and drawers
Fold blankets
Sew buttons
Clean up animal messes
Write thank-you notes
4th Grade: Change sheets
Do chores without a reminder
Wash car
5th Grade: Be alone at home for short periods
Pack own suitcase
6th Grade: Mow lawn with supervision
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